Life had been going well for Nyandom and her husband. Until tragedy struck.
In a part of South Sudan where many people struggle to find enough food, they had managed to build a secure life. Her husband ran a shop on the main road, selling food, clothes, and kitchen utensils. Nyandom looked after their home and their four children. Their marriage had been arranged, but they loved each other dearly.
After around eight years of marriage, her husband travelled, as he had done many times before, to the nearest large town to buy supplies for the business. But South Sudan is a country marked by conflict, and while he was there, the town was hit by an airstrike. Nyandom’s husband was killed instantly.
When a relative brought the news, Nyandom was at home with the children.
“I just couldn’t stop crying. He was a good man,” she recalls.
Her Brother-in-Law Takes Everything
During the first month after her husband’s death, several family members stayed with Nyandom and the children to help them through their grief. She mourned deeply. But she also knew she would soon have to find a way forward.
“It wasn’t easy to return to normal life, but we couldn’t bring him back. It was now my responsibility to provide for the children,” Nyandom explains.
Her husband’s brother, who lives nearby, promised in front of the whole family that he would support her.
“I am here for you. I am your husband’s brother. His children are my children,” he said.
But when the family returned home after a month, the brother-in-law showed a different side. He took all the family’s possessions and refused to let Nyandom enter the shop.
She protested. How else was she supposed to provide for her children? But when she stood up to him, he struck her hard across the face. Then he grabbed a large stick and began beating her.
“I was terrified. My first thought was: Is he going to kill me? And then: I miss my husband so much. He would never have done something like this.”
The Neighbours Step In
Fortunately, the neighbours heard the commotion and came running.
“What are you doing? You are dishonouring your older brother,” they shouted as they stepped between them.
Eventually, the brother-in-law went home, leaving Nyandom alone with her children. She was frightened, both that he might return and kill her, and that she would have no way to support her children without money or access to the shop.
News of the assault spread quickly around the village. Without Nyandom’s knowledge, one of the village elders contacted Nile Hope, DanChurchAid’s partner in this part of South Sudan.
The organisation supports women who have experienced violence. At the same time, it works to change the attitudes within local communities that help sustain violence against women. Nile Hope’s staff are well known and respected in the area.
Shortly afterwards, a female staff member from Nile Hope came to the village. She arranged for Nyandom to be taken to a safe location where they could talk privately.
The staff member provided counselling, helped her improve her safety and security, and gave her a small cash grant. Together, they developed a plan for how Nyandom could support her children.
At the organisation’s women’s centre, she met other women who had experienced violence. There, they receive support, learn handicraft skills, and make plans for generating their own income. Most importantly, they find a sense of community.
“We help and support each other,” she says.
Beginning to Believe in the Future Again
Today, Nyandom supports her four children on her own. She has several fields where she grows vegetables and hopes the harvest will be large enough to sustain the family through the coming months.
But one major issue remains unresolved: what will happen to the shop and possessions her husband left behind?
The family has come together to seek a solution. Nyandom has heard rumours that she will be awarded ownership of the shop, but no final decision has yet been made.
“I hope I receive all of his possessions so that I can take care of the children and give them an education,” she says.
Nyandom still misses her husband every day. When she looks at their children, she feels close to him.
“They look so much like him. When I see them, I almost feel as though he is still alive.”
She is still afraid sometimes. But she is no longer alone.
“My friends from the women’s centre have given me strength. I have started to believe that I can manage after everything that has happened,” she says.
Nile Hope supports women affected by violence
Nile Hope is DanChurchAid’s partner in South Sudan. In Nyandom’s community Nile Hope work with:
- Psychosocial support and counselling for women who have experienced violence.
- Safety and protection assistance, including referrals to safe spaces and relevant health services.
- Support at women’s centres, where women can meet, receive counselling, learn new skills, and make plans to generate an income.
- Discussions on violence and women’s rights with women, men, and the wider community to change attitudes and help prevent violence.
- Financial support through cash assistance programmes that enable particularly vulnerable families to buy food and cover other essential expenses.
DanChurchAid’s work to support women affected by violence is supported by the European Union as part of bigger program that also offers cash assistance to the most vulnerable people in the communities.2
Read more about the EU support here.